Author Archive for Adrian



29
Sep

Cheap Fuckers

The other day after finishing work, I walked to my car, parked at Basement 2 (level 2) and an alarm went off in me.

I saw some shattered glass on the ground right next to my car, and I rushed to it and saw that my side window was smashed. Some cheap fuckers actually smashed my car window to steal the Smart Tag.

Now, what I don’t get is the mindset of these cheap fuckers. The Smart Tag itself is not expensive (around RM100) and I guess these fuckers are more interested in the prepaid value in the Touch’N'Go card. Unfortunately (or fortunately), I have some 40 odd Ringgit left in the prepaid so the lost is not so great.

I mean, if I left my expensive watch or the fancy mobile phone in the car, or even a laptop, then I can’t blame these fuckers for smashing my window to steal those valuable items. It’s only a fucking Smart Tag and it is not something valuable! So why the fuck they want to waste their time and energy to steal something so cheap? So if they are not cheap fuckers, then I don’t know what to call them.

But what troubles me the most is the fact that these cheap fucker smashed my window and I got to replace it, and that is expensive, even before I add the lost in the Smart Tag and the value I got in the Touch’N'Go card. What piss me off more was the fact that after assessing the losses, I tried to go home and it started to rain.

God bless my soul, the rain stopped for that few minutes and I managed to park my car into my garage before the sky gave way to heavy downpour.

So why do these cheap fuckers steal something cheap like Smart Tag? Putting my genius mind in working mode, I drew up a few conclusions:

  1. These fuckers are basically just cheap and they like to thrill of stealing cheap things. Why? Because if they get caught for stealing something expensive, they will be punished big time.
  2. These fuckers don’t earn much, so they want to save some money in purchasing something that is strictly overpriced (yup, the Smart Tag, beside not being smart at all, is seriously overpriced) and they can’t afford to pay the toll. Well, if they can’t afford the toll, might as well sell of their cheap ass cars and buy a motorbike or some shit (and I don’t care what shit).
  3. Our country economy is going downhill and the inflation is going uphill, so everyone, even high earning individuals, are suffering from the economic setbacks, so they become cheap, and they start stealing cheap things.
  4. Some fuckers are just too damn free. They walked pass my car, went to take a peek into the interior, saw the Smart Tag, and went “Hmmm.. I am too free now, and I got nothing to do. So I will spend the 1 minute to steal the Smart Tag. Yay!”

For me, I am more incline to conclude that its “All The Above” as the answer. What do you think?

19
Sep

Google Chrome

chrome-screen-shotGoogle Chrome is a brand new browser developed by Google. Even though it is still in beta testing, I like it very much.

Like Google page, Gmail and etc, it is a lightweight browser, offering very clean interface (but can be a bit confusing since there aren’t many buttons!) and most importantly, a very fast loading time. I don’t have a timer on, but in general, it feels like Chrome takes less time to load a page than Internet Explorer, and even FireFox!

Most importantly, it is free!

Since Google Chrome is still in beta stage, I would suggest that you try it out on your free time, and can also use it heavily to test it on daily basis. But please don’t make it your main browser at this stage, doing internet transaction or any information-sensitive task because the developers and testers are still looking for bugs and any security flaws.

You can download it here.

17
Sep

My 2 Cents Worth

This post is about my view on the current situation in Malaysia, politically, at least. I am not a political-blogger, so to speak, and I don’t like to get my blog involved. But at this moment, I do feel the need to give out my 2 cents worth of thoughts on these issues.

After the March 8 General Election, there were a lot of political tension between the governing body (Barisan National) and the opposition (PKR). There were lots of talk (mamak talk, forum, etc) and hype about the come back of Anwar Ibrahim, the de factor leader of PKR, September 16 (If you are curious about the date, Google it with keyword “Malaysia” as I am too lazy to write about it).

I will be honest here; I don’t like Anwar Ibrahim, and that has been the case since many years back, even before he was jailed for sodomy charges. But I am tired of the current administration; the corruption, the abuse of power, the indecisiveness, and many more. So I don’t mind a change, but I will keep a close eyes on Anwar Ibrahim if he ever takes over the government and become the next Prime Minister.

Anwar has publicly announced that he has enough defector MPs (Member of Parliament) in his sleeve to form a simple majority government to take the reign from Barisan National (or BN) for the first time in 51 years of Malaysia history since the Merdeka Day (Independence Day). But now the bitch fight between Anwar and Badawi (the current Prime Minister) is the school-girl’s I-want-to-see-you-but-I-don’t-want-to-see-you.

Can someone slap some sense into these two and ask them to grow up? Anwar demanded a meeting with Badawi, and Badawi said that Anwar doesn’t have the name list so it is a waste of his time to meet with Anwar. But Anwar doesn’t want to reveal the names of the cross-over MPs due to safety issue.

I do understand where do Anwar come from, but revealing the list is a better deal, at least I think, because if anything were to happen to these individuals who are crossing over, how would the Barisan National party, especially the Prime Minister Badawi, and his deputy Najib, can explain? The people are not stupid, and we will definitely link the stories together to ensure that the current governing party is plain dirty and we, the people, will do something about it.

So I strongly encourage you to reveal the list, Mr. Anwar Ibrahim, instead of hiding this and that. I understand that you are afraid that the government will impose the Internal Security Act (ISA) on you and the cross-over MPs (like the poor people lately that has been arrested, for their so-called safety, but somehow they forgot that Ahmad Ismail is the one causing the problem so he should be arrested under ISA), but sometimes you need to take the risk to be a hero.

Or maybe these MPs, like the rest, have dirt on their hands and they are worried that some agencies, like Anti Corruption Agency (ACA) will get their hands on them, or some other agencies with fancy names.

Another possibility is that if the opposition is taking over the government by force, it has far more implications than safety but national security. The army and police arm forces are under the regime of the current political party. So if you can just spend that few moments to imagine it, the result could be dire.

I am more incline to believe that Anwar has the MPs on his side. The reason is very simple; Anwar is a seasoned politician, and if he is bluffing this time, it is him that is committing suicide on his political career. He’ll be done, unforgiven by the people on this country for giving false hope, for the deception, and many more. He will be doomed to no end, and since it is such a big risk, I don’t think (or at least I hope not) he is stupid enough to take this kind of risk. Remember, if Badawi calls his bluff, he’s done and gone, and he will never be able to come back anymore.

And Badawi, what do you have to loose but that 15 minutes of your precious time to meet with Anwar Ibrahim? Are you that afraid of him? Are you worry that he will really come up with a list? If you are not sure, then why call his bluff in public? If you are sure, why not just meet him and expose him? Please take some responsibilities and stop standing on the other end of the shore and shout names. We are all adult here, so deal with it with more maturity instead of blasting people off in the media but not wanting to confront the situation. You can say all you want about Anwar being a bluff or whatever that you want to call, but not facing the situation is not much of bravery.

On a side note, the arrest of Raja Petra, Theresa Kok and the poor journo from Sin Chew, Ms. Tan, are unjust and ridicule. If they have done something wrong, bring them to court and implicate them to our justice system. The “excuse” given for taking Ms. Tan into custody under the ISA is plain stupid; for her own safety because of threats on her life? Oh come on! And if she was really in danger, why only keep her for 18 hours? So you guys need 18 hours to solve the threat? Then why not release information on how you guys solve the threat on Ms. Tan, and bring those people to jail? Why can’t you solve the threat (in that 18 hours) without bring her into custody under ISA?

Because she reported the truth in a Chinese newspaper, then you bring her in. How about Ahmad Ismail, who is only suspended and stripped from his post for 3 years? (source here) His remark was racist and he was the one who caused the uproar of other ethnicity in the country, yet he refused to make public apologies to the Chinese community, and yet he is free to roam the country. Ahmad Ismail should be detained under the ISA and charged in court.

I am not here to say Chinese, Indian or Malay. Why do we need to differentiate ourselves like that? In our educational system, we were taught that we are ONE NATION, and we are all MALAYSIANS, but yet, our leaders are pledging something else different, using race as their play cards all the time, making sarcastic and racist remarks. So how the fuck are we going to unite as a nation, to call ourselves Malaysians?

So can ya’ll please stop playing the race card and act like you mean it when you teach “One Malaysia, One Malaysian”?

The following is the full press statement by Anwar Ibrahim, courtesy of Malaysiakini.

Sept 16 press statement in full
Sep 16, 08 3:40pm

The following is the statement given by Opposition Leader Anwar Ibrahim at a 2pm press conference at the PKR headquarters in Petaling Jaya today.
MCPX

Today, Malaysians celebrate Malaysia Day - the day our country became whole and our people become united. This day has a new meaning. After years of struggle, after fighting against a system that is corrupt and unjust - we affirm that victory is finally at hand. Our vision of rebuilding this country and bringing its people together, as the founding fathers envisioned, is within reach.

The economy is in turmoil with runaway inflation and joblessness creating widespread discontent. Racial tensions have been rising, exacerbated by the propaganda spread in the government owned mainstream media. The administration has offered no vision to steer the nation out of this quagmire and there is manifest erosion in confidence in the current government.

We in Pakatan Rakyat believe we can save Malaysia from economic ruin and the dangerous politics of racism. We will do so prudently, legally and in doing so we will not jeopardise the security and stability of the country and the safety of its people.

We have received firm commitments from members of parliament in excess of the number required to form a new government, and our government will reflect the diverse make-up of Malaysian society.

It has been our concern to ensure a peaceful transition of power. We do not wish to see a repeat of what transpired in the Selangor and Perak state governments, where following the victory of Pakatan Rakyat on March 8, documents were shredded and removed by the outgoing administration.

We furthermore advise radical elements within BN against the abuse of state power to unlawfully harass and detain our supporters.

The immediate investigation by the ACA (Anti-Corruption Agency) of Yong Teck Lee after the announcement by SAPP (Sabah Progressive Party) of its intention to move a motion of no-confidence against Abdullah Ahmad Badawi is another example of the tactics we reject.

The use of the ISA, as has happened to MP Teresa Kok, would be an unlawful impediment to the transition process.

In light these serious concerns, yesterday leaders of Pakatan Rakyat sent a letter to the prime minister at 2.30pm requesting a meeting to discuss the future course of the nation’s leadership and to seek his assurance on the following important matters:

1) That the BN shall not hinder or prevent their BN MPs from acting in accordance with their conscience, constitutional rights and independent judgment;

2) That the BN government shall not invoke the Internal Security Act to detain any of the MPs who will join Pakatan Rakyat, or any of the present 82 Pakatan Rakyat MPs;

3) That the BN government shall not invoke emergency or police powers, or suspend the constitution, or dissolve parliament in response to our intention to form a new government;

4) That the Barisan Nasional government shall not impose roadblocks and impede the MPs from gaining access to the House of Parliament and the institutions of government.

We believe the prime minister will share Pakatan Rakyat’s concerns for the welfare of the people and security of the nation. We are confident he will ensure the BN will act constitutionally and democratically to ensure that the transition will be peaceful, and there will be no actions taken to sabotage the wishes of the people or play on racial tensions in the country.

We appeal to all quarters in Malaysian society to understand our intentions are for the betterment of Malaysian society. The mainstream media, in particular, should accept the reality of these historic times and report fairly, accurately and without bias. The irresponsible tact that is used by the media to obfuscate issues, attack opposition supporters and instigate racial tensions must end immediately.

Following our meeting with the prime minister, we intend to proceed within the framework established by the federal constitution in the formation of a new government, with the assent of the Yang di-Pertuan Agong.

ANWAR IBRAHIM
Opposition Leader
De facto PKR leader

PS: With the current situation, I am not sure if I will be detained under ISA as well. Let’s wish me luck.

17
Sep

Taking a Short Break

I am not sure if anyone has noticed, but I have been taking a short break from blogging activities. I am spending more time for my personal life, spending the same amount of time at work (which is pretty heavy stuff), and after these long days, I seriously lack the energy to write anything. In fact, my apologies to my readers and I also apologize to my friends; I haven’t been able to visit your blog for the past few weeks.

I guess an update is necessary.

So far, work has picked up pretty much of my time as there are many deadlines to hit, and then with the political instability issues in Malaysia, our sales are affected and so I am working diligently to overcome this issues, making ends meet, hitting the sales target, keeping everyone happy, writing a report on why the sales performance is not as good as expected, meet the directors, meet the customers, meet the business partners, meet the suppliers, meet the end-users, meet the engineers, and etc.

Yup, it is pretty much fucked.

As for my personal life, I am expanding my social circle, spending more time with friends, spending a lot of time with Billy to ensure he is well taken care of, playing with him to ensure that he gets plenty of exercise to build up his hip since Golden Retrievers are prone to hip dysplasia. Right now, Billy has grown up in size and he is getting healthier compared to the day when I got him.

Yup, it is pretty joyful.

Anyway, a lot of people has asked me about my views on the current political situation and I will throw in my 2 cents worth later today, and maybe I will even schedule post it for tomorrow.

I am not sure when I will be “back on duty” officially for my blog, but I really need to take some break from everything.

Stay tune and come back frequently to check on new post, okay?

29
Aug

Censored

Today I just saw the news that Malaysia Communications and Multimedia Commission (MCMC) has ordered the ISPs to block access to Malaysia-Today portal (source).

PETALING JAYA: All 21 Internet Service Providers (ISPs) in the country have been ordered by the Malaysian Communications and Multimedia Commission (MCMC) to block the controversial Malaysia Today website, an industry source revealed.

The notices were sent out on Tuesday in accordance with Section 263 of the Communications and Multimedia Act.

“This means that MCMC is allowed to block any particular website which has committed acts that contravene the local laws of the country, for example, sedition,” the source said.

Meanwhile, Malaysia Today editor Raja Petra Kamaruddin lashed out against the blocking of the online portal, saying it was a breach of the Multimedia Super Corridor (MSC) charter.

Under the MSC Malaysia 10-Point Bill of Guarantees, it is stated that as part of its commitment to ensuring the success of MSC Status companies, the Government promised to “ensure no Internet censorship”.

“The Government has clearly broken its own promise,” said Raja Petra yesterday. Asked whether he was notified of the reasons of the blocking, he answered no.

“I will turn this into a big issue, no doubt. When it is known that the Government has violated the charter, MSC will die. I will personally see to it,” he said.

TMnet, the country’s biggest ISP, Maxis and Time refused to comment.

However, at 11.30pm, a check by The Star found that Malaysia Today has launched a mirror site which can be easily accessed.

Hmmm.. this is really something interesting.

First of all, is the gahmen admitting that they are losing the Internet war? If this is not the case, then why the gahmen is censoring the Internet?

Or is it because the editor of Malaysia-Today, Raja Petra, revealed too much information about the gahmen so gahmen fears that the public will know too much? If that’s not the case, then why censor the website from the public? If Raja Petra did not open up too much cans of worms, why the fear and hide and censor the Internet? If those allegations were not true, why not counter these allegations with proof instead of barking nonsensically?

Or the gahmen only want the people of Malaysia to read those controlled mass media? Then what’s the difference between communism and all this crap? Might as well as limit emails, Internet, phone calls, and only allow controlled newspaper, radio stations, tv stations, books and all that. That would be easier, no?

It’s something I don’t understand, and I can’t be bother enough to spend too much time thinking about all these nonsense. These adults are not acting like one anyway, so better don’t waste time and energy with them.

28
Aug

Finding Myself

Yesterday is history, and tomorrow is mystery. But today is a gift; that’s why it’s called Present - Master Oogway (Kung Fu Panda)

The night was running late, but I was still wide awake.

I looked up into the cloudy night sky, and saw the low cloud and the moon was hiding behind the cloud like a shy girl peeking at her man from behind the curtain. It was star-less but the weather was nice, and I could feel the wind brushing my arms and face gently like a kiss from a girl.

I grabbed hold of the fruit punch I bought from the nearby 7-11 store and took a big gulp. I was exhausted physically after the intensive badminton game, but mentally and spiritually, I was very much alive.

I could still remember the girl at the badminton court saying “Oh it’s okay” and the smile she gave me after I apologized for almost running into her. It was a sweet-weird smile.

I swatted the memory away. It was nothing sort of importance and I didn’t want to waste my time remembering something pointless like that.

The night was calm, but my mind was clouded with many thoughts. There have been a few things happening that they had been clouding my mind, affecting my judgment and worse of all, I couldn’t think straight for the past few days.

Enjoying the serenity of the night, the warm August wind swept my thoughts away and finally, my mind was crystal clear and I could sense myself for the first time in weeks. I was at a crossroad and I lost myself in the path of the journey, but now, I could finally find myself, thanks to the moonless sky and the fruit punch.

In a way, I am blessed.

25
Aug

You Don’t Mess With Zohan

During the weekend, I went to watch You Don’t Mess with Zohan with a group of friends. It was one of the most anticipated movie from Adam Sandler but I left the cinema unsatisfied and wanting for more.

First of all, Zohan is a really funny movie. But after some of his best (so far) like 50 First Dates, Spanglish, The Longest Yard, Click, Reign Over Me, and I Now Pronounce You Chuck and Larry, Zohan is a bit of a disappointment.

50 First Dates is just pure funny and yet romantic in a way. Spanglish (with the super yummy Paz Vega) is hilarious yet very meaningful, and Click, which has lots of meaning to it and it touched a lot of people’s heart and hilarious at the same time. Reign Over Me is not a comedy, I think, but it was one of the best Adamn Sandler’s performance that showcase how passing of a love one can affect a perfectly healthy person.

But Zohan is based on stupid-nonsense-erotic-cheap jokes where the director and the actors were playing cheap jokes on penises and boobs and vaginas. I mean, at the beginning it was damn funny, but towards the middle of the movie, I got tired of those cheap jokes and wonder where’s the usual depth in Sandler’s movies. Maybe, just maybe, I don’t get the issues about Palestine and Israel and the whole middle east, but I think I do know enough about their political situations that it wasn’t funny as Sandler portrayed it.

I am not going to go into details of the movie, as you can go to the various website or the official Zohan website (here) to get a glimpse of the movie or something because I don’t think I want to spend that time to write about something I didn’t really enjoy (well, to be fair and frank, I did enjoy the company of the friends very much).

Was it worth the RM10 for the movie admission?

There are two ways to look at it. If you are looking for the usual good stuff from Adam Sandler, then no, save that RM10 and buy back one of those older movies from Adam Sandler’s. But if you are bored and looking for cheap laugh, then yes, it will definitely worth that hard-earn RM10 of yours.

14
Aug

my role

Angels sent me here to be your rest area, so you can stop and rest when you are tired on your life journey. Angels sent me here to be your lighthouse, so that I can show you the way when you are completely lost in the utter darkness. Angels send me away when you don’t need me anymore.

There is an old saying that everyone that comes into our lives serves a purpose, a role, and when the purpose or role is fulfilled, they will disappear from our lives until the next time. Some of them stay longer, and some of them don’t. Ultimately, the end result is the same; they will disappear while new people will come into our lives to fulfill their purposes, their roles.

I am not referring the roles or purposes as the intention to be used. I am referring to the God (whichever God you are serving) intended way for us to come to this world, know the people that we know, cross-path with the people that don’t stay on for too long. That’s the roles and purposes that I am referring to.

Sometimes I would sit down, a bottle of ice-cold beer in hand, and I flashback on the people that I have met in my life. Sometimes I would wonder what was my purpose, the role that I was playing, in their lives and what was the thing that I needed to do to fulfill my “responsibilities”. Sometimes I know the answers, but sometimes I don’t. Sometimes I would wonder what were their roles or responsibilities when they appear in my life. Were they there to teach me lessons, to help me, to make me realize what kind of person I am, to make me realize what kind of person I want to be, and to make me realize what kind of girl(s) I want in life to make me truly happy?

When I look back to my previous experience, I noticed that sometimes I would cross path with someone, a complete stranger, and we would become friends. Then most often than not, they were someone troubled by life and I was there to give support, advices, helps, in whatever means I can provide. Then, when they recovered, they move on, and we lost touch, and that’s about it. So the sole purpose of me appearing in their lives, crossing the path with them, was just to help them out?

And this happened not only once but many times.

Somehow I sense that this is happening, right at this moment, that my new role is to give a helping hand and once things are done, once my “responsibilities” are fulfilled, both of us will move on to our intended path to continue our life journey.

On the other hand, her purpose is to help me to get over something that has been bothering me, realizing that I am still capable of having feelings for someone, and finally revealing the break-up to my family.

08
Aug

untitled

Watch your thoughts; they become words.
Watch your words; they become actions.
Watch your actions; they become habits.
Watch your habits; they become character.
Watch your character; for it becomes your destiny! - Frank Outlaw

Standing under the street light, I tucked my right hand into the pocket of my jeans, while using the other hand to hold the cigarettes. My third since I arrived.

The night was clear and warm, and there were some nice August wind blowing against me, pressing my shirt onto my bare skin, brushing every strand of my hair, and I could feel the humidity kissing my face ever softly.

I looked around the street, and it was very quiet; not a single car passed by, not a single person was in sight. The street was completely deserted, and occasionally I could hear a dog or two barking from a far distance away.

I looked at my watch, and then took another drag on my cigarettes while enjoying the serene night in the neighborhood. Her neighborhood, not mine.

The remote gate gave out a soft click, and one of the doors opened slightly. She danced out from the door, giving me a broad smile while waving happily.

“Sorry to keep you waiting!” she exclaimed loudly.

I took one super deep drag on the cigarettes and threw the cigarettes butt into the drain, exhaled out the dispose, and gave her a big smile, a smile from ear to ear, and replied, “It’s okay dear. I just arrived anyway.”

I opened the car door for her, and then I started the engine. While I slotted to the first gear, she leaned over and rested her head on my shoulder.

“I am very tired,” she whispered softly.

“Okay, so do you want to rest?” I asked gently, while resisting the temptation to turn my head to sniff the scent of her shampoo, or to kiss her hair, or to touch her hair.

“But I am hungry! After dinner I will rest early,” she replied while shifting her head a bit to find a comfortable spot on my shoulder.

We found the food place and we laughed on the jokes while she was enjoying her dinner. I ate earlier so I was just having a drink while watching her.

On the way back, the Bangsar street was deserted. She rested her head on my shoulder again, taking a short nap while I was driving.

My heart beat went up a notch, and I couldn’t help but to hope that things were different, different in the way that she would see me differently. Instead of a “Brother”, I was hoping for something more intimate, something more. (No, I am not referring that she should see me like a “Father” kind of more)

When we reached her house, I nudged her softly, and she woke up. She rubbed her face a bit, gave me a sweet broad smile, and yawned.

“Oh we have reached,” she whispered, her voice was in a shade of coarse after waking up from a nap.

“Yup. Go and rest early, ok?”

“Okaaay…” she looked at me and gave me a smile again.

She closed the car door, and waved a long good bye to me. I waved back, while my heart was sinking deeper and deeper yet again.

I understood my role in this whole thing. No matter how I hated the role that I am playing, I have to continue because in a way, she needed me. In a way, that’s how I got to spend time with her.

I looked up the sky, and the night was cloudless and for once, I could see some stars in the cloudless night.

But my heart was clouded.

~The End~

05
Aug

Intensity

Quote of the Day - Do you love me because I am beautiful, or am I beautiful because you love me?

She turned her gaze towards me, looking deep into my soul with her bright twinkling eyes, searching for an answer, searching for a clue.

My heart skipped a beat or two, and I used up all my strength to squeeze out a weak smile. Even though it was a weak smile, from years of field training in sales, no one noticed the weakness in that smile.

She smiled back, and the twinkling in her eyes shone brighter than ever. She shifted her weight by moving her feet, her head tilted slightly and she looked up into my eyes again, with curiosity, smiling, and her eyes were forever telling during that moment.

I inhaled, not knowing what to do, not sure how to react.

I looked her into the eyes, seeing a beautiful soul and a wonderful heart, and I felt that I was raising my hands. I resisted the urge to grab her shoulder to pull her nearer, closer to my heart, and I resisted the temptation to kiss her softly on the lips, to feel her soft lips onto mine for the very first time.

She raised her heels and leaned closer and taller, and she smiled to me again.

I froze and my mind went blank while my heart skipped another beat again. I looked at her, wondering if she was sending an invitation to get closer, to kiss her. Suddenly there was an explosion of joy inside me, and I was excited for the possibility of being able to kiss her for the very first time.

She said something, but I couldn’t focus on the conversation and all I saw was her lips moving, but the whole world was silent.

I thought I replied something, and she laughed, and she was slapping on my shoulder. I brought myself back into the conversation and asked her what did she just say. She laughed, “You were not making sense. What were you talking about?”

“I don’t know,” I replied honestly.

“You know, sorry for giving you the trouble,” I said. Her mom was complaining that we have been seeing each other for everyday for the past few weeks.

“Oh don’t worry about it. She’s like that and she will be fine.”

I turned my gaze towards the dog, and pretending that I was paying full attention to the dog but in fact, I was paying most of my attention to her.

She stood next to me, and nudged me using her shoulder, and she laughed.

We spent the next few minutes watching the dog playing on the grass, sniffing the scent left by others, checking out the birds chirping somewhere, and we talked about nothing but everything.

“You know,” she said, “I am very glad that you are here tonight.”

I turned and looked at her, mere inches away from me, resisting the temptation to hug her as tight as possible, feeling her heart beat against mine. “Oh yeah? Why is that?”

“Well, you are like an older brother to me, taking good care of me, and thanks for spending time with me,” she whispered.

I looked out the main gate, and then I checked my watch.

7:05am.

A ray of light just broke through the dark clouds, and the air was misted with morning frost. But my heart felt heavy and I felt that it was too bright.

“Guess what,” I gave out a weaker smile again, “I am glad that I am here too.”

Pretentious was the game.

After another few more minutes, I waved my good bye and moved the leaded legs of mine away from her house, through the main gate, and walked slowly to my car.

The door close with a thud, and my heart sunk deeper and deeper while the ray of light in the sky grew brighter.

Brother. I hate the word “Brother” ever since.

~ The End ~




 

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