Traditionally, on some very special occasion, such as my birthday, I will reflect back and see what I had went through, how much I had grown and what am I experiencing now. Right at this moment, I am going to create a Now and Then list.
Again, the keyword is “Traditionally”. I am known for not following rules and creating my own rules. I am known not a traditional guy but being kinda creative. So I can say that this is not my birthday yet, but I just feel like creating such list for my up and coming birthday. Beside, this is my blog and I can write whatever I want, as and when I want. So bear with it.
Only selected few know about my actual birth date as I don’t like to celebrate it in a big fuzzy way.
Ok, I lied. Only selected few know about my actual birth date is because only few bother to remember my birthday, so in order to make myself feel better, I don’t tell anyone my birth date so that I won’t feel disappointed when I don’t at least get a SMS greeting from them.
Anyway, back to my list…
15 Years Ago, I…
- Believed that the world was a beautiful place and there was so much to explore and learn
- Believed that there was my true love waiting for me somewhere out there and it was for me to discover this person
- Was hoping to lose my virginity as soon as possible
- Was hoping to find the true meaning of life.
10 Years Ago, I….
- Lost my father to heart disease.
- Plunged into real world and had to grow up as fast as possible.
- Saw the ugly faces of people and learned the fact that everyone has their price.
- Saw the ugly side of the world.
- Understood that sometimes women can be as unfaithful as men.
- Got no time to think of meaning of life but to survive.
5 Years Ago, I…
- Thought I found my true love.
- Thought I understood the meaning of life.
- Understood that the world was ugly but yet beautiful place.
- Believed that love ones can be trusted.
- Started to plan for future and implementing some of the plans.
Now, I…
- Don’t believe in true love. The only thing that matters the most is finding someone who can tolerate each other for many years to come.
- Realized that everyone has a different perception on meaning of life, and understand that we all have different role to fulfill in other peoples’ life.
- Have to start all over again after loosing everything.
- See the world as neither ugly nor beautiful.
- Understand that no one can be trusted, completely.
- Understand that nothing is forever, so if someone say that he/she will love you forever, that is nothing but lies.
These are the things that I had learned over the past 15 years. Some of them are great eye opener, some are some invaluable life long lessons I learned, and some of them are just understanding my life, my role and things like that.
Do you have a similar list? I am eager to find out what you have learned.
sometimes being a little naive closes your eyes to the ugly side of the world, and you believe everything is beautiful…
i believe, the older we get, the uglier the world gets, and the more pessimistic we become, or at least not as optimistic as we were.
15 years ago, i thought i would never grow up, that i would remain a kid and be happy forever.
10 years ago, i thought i was happiest being on the volleyball team (i quit after a few months).
5 years ago, i thought i was blessed score in my exams.
Now, i am not living out my dream in uni, due to restrictions from my family.
I can’t say that i have as much experience as you do, because i have not seen much of the world yet, or at least KL.
KL is starting to open my eyes to the ugly society. People are a diverse group, and they change how we see ourselves and others. Maybe they’ll even change the way we are. I am trying to retain who I was before I came to KL, trying to improve by my standards, and not going backward. Time is passing by for me, and I learn not to regret.
Never ever regret. I believe everything happens for a reason… like karma…
adrian, i think everyone does go thru the similar process. that’s why we say life is a series of growth, and our personality and thinking changes according to what we experienced. some people may experience A then B then C. some others may go thru B then C then A.
when 2 people meet, each has its past. whether both match, it’s hard to tell. if yes, then go live happily ever after. else, continue the seeking process. sometimes u may think u get the right one, but in actual u don’t.
what to say, this is just life. but i believe no matter how is it, we as a human, is able to cope with it.
so be positive.
May - You are not living your dreams in uni? What was your dream? Why is it that you don’t live your dreams? Well, we have to compromise once a while in our life but that don’t stop us from pursuing our dreams. So my suggestion is: go all the way and do what you want.
haan - True, but then, I basically just “live and see” and don’t pursue anything at the moment beside work and spending time with Billy Bob
I think that way I don’t have to stress myself in anyway.
it’s all about the money…
but since i’m in my current line of studies, i guess it’s still ok, so, just gonna go with the flow and see where it takes me…
but i still have time, cos i am younger than my peers in uni.. i think i have an advantage over them… =]
Oh yes, that’s always the problem. But don’t worry about it, as things are normally OK after a while.
You definitely has advantages over other people, but it depends on how you utilize your strength and your knowledge to use those advantages. Bear with it for now, and you will be fine